Our Visit Trip

I must admit I was EXTREMELY nervous about leaving my children here and visiting my son (still can't believe he's mine) in Guatemala. I had many questions going through my head like...would we have that immediate BOND that happens when you give birth to your child? I have been blessed with biological children but, worried deep down inside HOW does it all work. When I was pregnant I felt them in the WOMB and was able to nurture like that. But, with Joshua I had WONDERFUL pictures and YES video...I felt LOVE but, was it the same kind. I wondered before with MY previous children..How can you love another child..you have SO much LOVE for that 1st child How does it happen? But, it just does....GOD has made us to where we can SHARE that AMAZING...die for your child LOVE....with ALL of your kids EQUALLY!!! But, yet again I ask myself HOW does it work with adoption? I CAN stand here TODAY CONFIDENT (crying as I write this) that it happens....I LOVE JOSHUA just like my other children....I would go to the ENDS of the EARTH for him...I WOULD die for my SON!!! Now with that said Please, join me as I take you through ONE of the MOST WONDERFUL yet GUT WRENCHING times of my life.

Fri. May 4th @ 2AM: We are heading out the door to catch our flight in Nashville...you maybe wondering WHY didn't we just stay there overnight...the answer is simply this I'm to CHEAP!! LOL. We are scheduled to fly out @ 6AM and have a good 2-2 1/2 hr. drive ahead of us. We made it in GREAT time, got checked in and waited to board. By, the way I am NO flier can't stand it and Michael has NEVER flown before and me just once. It was time to board and I was NERVOUS then I saw the INSIDE of the plane and became even MORE so!! It was SO small...Michael's head (he's 5'9") grazed the ceiling of the plane....OH MY!!!! I composed myself and made it.....prayed ALOT of the time. We landed in Houston, TX and had an 1 1/2hr. layover then boarded the next flight. In case your wondering I did TERRIFIC....BIG plane....it made me VERY happy. We landed in Guatemala on TIME @ 11:32. I couldn't believe we were actually there. Outside of the airport was overwhelming to say in the least. We waited for our shuttle from the Radisson to pick us up and we were off to see our son.

The Meeting: We were scheduled to meet our FM MariaLuisa and Joshua at 2pm. Well, that time came and we WAITED, WAITED, WAITED.....then finally a phone call @ 2:30pm. It was our translator she had a flat tire and would be there in about 30min. and asked if we could wait. She had our baby with her the answer was YES!!!!! Everyone arrived @ 3pm and there HE was MY SON....words can't express my feelings at that time. Our FM handed him directly over to me and said (with a translator), "This is your child you are his mommy and daddy." I will NEVER forget those words and my TEARS were flowing. The BOND was IMMEDIATE...I felt like I just gave birth to a 13lb baby. We talked about eating habits, likes, dislikes and that was it.....HE was with US we thought that was it but, our FM turned around and handed us a photo album she had made of him. It was WONDERFUL!!! We are so lucky to have MariaLuisa. Our shuttle that would take us to our next destination....El Palacio De Dona Beatriz in Antigua...was there waiting and we left.

Arriving and Driving: On the way there I just stared at him....Joshua was a picture brought to LIFE!! I couldn't...and to this day can't...believe I was holding, kissing, loving, feeling, squeezing, snuggling and just plain ENJOYING him. It was just WONDERFUL!!!! Boy, you could tell a difference when you arrived in Antigua..the DRIVING....OH MY!!!! There are NO lines in the street to show what side to be on and the stop signs....NEVER noticed those being used. You will happen upon a narrow road...2 cars you would think....NO poss. 3 and then a motorcycle riding beside you and another car. Very different from back home. When we arrived at the B&B we were greeted by a wonderful staff.....this was a BEAUTIFUL place. Everyone was SO friendly and very helpful. We got settled in and headed to the Market (grocery) to get bottled water, cereal for Joshua and snack food.

Market: The market was EXTREMELY busy....I'm not sure if it was the day we went on (Fri.) or if it's just usually like that. We shopped around got our things and went to check out. There were boys (children) up there working....putting boxes together and bagging groceries. It was SO sad to see them having to work but, they were doing it with a SMILE on there face. When we were done we gave a little boy a tip US$1...the look on his face was PRICELESS....he had the biggest GRIN and his eyes were just HUGE!!! You see our US$1 is equal to 7.5 quetzels he was RICH!! His little face will be etched in my mind for a VERY long time. When we were done there we got in a Tuk, Tuk (golf cart like thing) and went back to our B&B. The roads there are all cobblestone and Joshua's little head was just bouncing around...I held him tight to my chest to help his little bobbling head.

Shopping: There a MANY places to shop at in Antigua. You can choose the more traditional stores (prices marked no negotiating), open markets (bargaining) or you can choose to buy from various people...children included....that are selling all sorts of things on the street. We bought each of our girls a purse, change purse, necklace, bracelet, handmade flute (beautiful), writing pad and pen. Keep in mind ALL of this stuff is handmade and is GORGEOUS. We bought Joshua the cutest Guatemalan hat, Guatemalan boy doll, a hand painted pic. of a Jaguar to go in his "Jungle" themed room, hand painted Morocco, and a BEAUTIFUL blanket with Guatemalan children embroidered on it. We also, purchased purses, other jewelry and a hand painted plate of the ARCH in Antigua it's GORGEOUS. We also brought back Quetzels (money) for the girls and Joshua to have.

Food and Sightseeing: There were many wonderful places to eat while we were there and we were fortunate during our stay to meet other CCI family members. I say FAMILY because you do grow so, close to these people and they are ALL so, very wonderful!!!! To my new friends Julie, Gavin's mommy (waiting)...Kellie, Andrea's mommy (waiting).....and Sarah, Caleb's mommy (Home Forever) it was such an HONOR to get to meet you and your wonderful children you will ALWAYS be a part of our family and hopefully one day we can ALL reunite again with our BEAUTIFUL children. Thanks for taking this journey with me.

While we were there we got the opportunity to visit Santo Domingo it's an old Monastery that has been made into a hotel. It was simply BEAUTIFUL!!!! You got to visit the ruins, shops and the grounds were just BREATHE TAKING!!!

Joshua: I bet your asking yourself....How did Joshua do while you were out running around? The answer is WONDERFUL!! He LOVED being in his Snuggli....I'm not saying he didn't have a few FUSSY moments but, majority of the time he was PERFECT!! We also, didn't spend ALL day out...we would usually go out later in the day for a little looking around have dinner and would be back at 6pm.....out for maybe 4 hours somedays a little more or a little less. On a few occasions we would leave earlier. But, we needed to make sure we were around a tub by 7 or 8pm Joshua LOVED his baths!!!! I would take one with him and he would PLAY so hard for 20-30min. That was a GREAT bonding time for us...then daddy would come get him out...lotion up, jammie's on and then it would be cereal time.....and he LOVED his cereal. We would give it to him at least 2x sometimes 3x a day. As for sleeping....that was a WHOLE different story. The crib (which we were gracious for) was low to the ground and every time you would put him down he would cry....so, like with my other children....he SLEPT with us YES....I know but, it was WONDERFUL!!! Daddy on the other hand was a NERVOUS wreck with him up there. But, he made it just fine.
While we were there several people came up to us and told us he is lucky to have found a home. But, what people didn't understand is that WE are the lucky ones. God would have found him a home but, for our LORD to have chosen US that is TRULY amazing....I am so undeserving yet, he gave me this little one to LOVE and NURTURE...we are VERY blessed.

Leaving Wed. May 9th: The day had to come to say our goodbyes!!! I had been dreading this day for the majority of our trip. I started crying 3 days before it was time to leave. We left our B&B @ 11am and arrived @ the Radisson around 12pm. We were scheduled to meet our FM @ 4pm and I was a WRECK!! I thought to myself how can I leave my son? I prayed for many days for a PEACE to come over me and it did. While video taping Joshua our phone rang it was 3:30pm and our FM was there. I thought to myself...she's EARLY what am I going to do. I had my son in my arms and in just a few minutes he would LEAVE me for I don't know how long. We went down the elevator tears streaming and met MariaLuisa she started crying also. She spoke to me...I had Michael to hurry and get a translator....I did figure out she asked for me to sit. Our translator came over. He told me that MariaLuisa said, "You are his mommy and this is his daddy I will take care of him for you until you come back." Those words were such a comfort. Our FM and the translator stayed with us for 30min. I had NO tears!!! The LORD had granted me this PEACE (crying while typing this)...he sent MariaLuisa to calm my fears. Before leaving she handed me a present and told me, "You are his mommy Happy Mother's Day". It was a purse and card from my son..I am So thankful the LORD has sent MariaLuisa to be apart of our lives FOREVER!!! We gave our hugs and kisses and off he went. I cried a little but, had such a PEACE come over me. A part of my HEART was left in Guatemala on that day and it will not be WHOLE again until he comes HOME FOREVER!!! I MISS you my son, but find comfort that GOD in HIS perfect timing will reunite us again....and every sun I see rise and sun I see set I know you are under it with me JUST a FEW miles away. I LOVE you ALL the way to HEAVEN and BACK!!!!